Superman has his phone booth: the Weathermen have Starbuck's bathroom. We changed there for convenience: it was nearby, private and right on a corner-- It was a drive thru with a small rear bathroom unseen to most driving by. Downside was it was same drive thru I bought coffee at for the news staff every day, so we tried to be inconspicuous and kept our heads down as we slipped in the back. Inside, the bathroom was as filthy as we were: sticky floors, sticky socks, sticky doors and sticky cocks.
We had to change fast-- hard putting on skin-tight suits when you're hard: a real challenge to fast change with a smokin-hot partner.
The stall was cramped. I told Jack that we'd have about the same amount of room in a phone booth. Jack rubbed my codpiece and said, "But phone booths are so passé."
I wondered how superheroes changed so fast? I decided there were two reasons, and we were it. Only one Superman, only one Spiderman, only one Ironman; there were two of us.
Ever tried to get your freak on in 36 inch wide bathroom?
Yeah, two horny Weathermen. Jack was my problem, and I was his. Christ, he groped my ass, and I turned to some much melted American cheese. And of course, I just couldn't let Jack's fondling pass-- one feel deserves another. I groped his front. I couldn't stop thinking about how amazing Jack's buns of steel looked in cornflower blue spandex. I pretended to help him, when what I really was doing was feeling him up. Next thing I knew, my hands were down his super leotards, and Jack's wet spot had spread out all over his super extremities.
I checked my watch. So far it had taken us eighteen minutes and five seconds to shop and six minutes and thirty-two seconds to change, and with the six minutes we blew talking at Channel 6, that left us less than thirty minutes to find Nefarious and foil her plan. There was a need for seed... um... I mean speed.
Jack was the one who reined us in. "Whoa! We've got to get ready. And you've got to get your super-hearing into gear-- start listening for Nefarious."
Yeah, he was right. We needed to save the world. I took my hand out of that the front of that fine blue spandex and set my super ears on auditory alert. Setting? Super-sensitive. With a bit of fine-tuning, I heard the unmistakable crack of a whip, crush of leather thighs and cackle of a madwoman. I'd located her, and she was in the same hemisphere.
We were ready. It was Jack's turn to follow me. I felt his hot breath on my neck as I flung the door open.
I knew it was corny saying it, but I couldn't help myself.
"Up, up and away!"
It didn't take long: we were either really, really fast or time just flies by when you're having fun. Either way, I pointed down.
We landed behind some large boulders on the icy tundra.
"Shit!" Jack said. "It's cold in this damned outfit! Where the hell are we? Iceland?"
"Sh-h-h! No, Greenland."
"But there's fucking ice and snow all over! This can't be Greenland!"
"No, Iceland is green. Greenland is ice."
"Who the fuck cares! It's cold! And where's Nefarious' evil lair?"
I hate the cold, too, but no sense bitching. I got busy and looked for an opening by feeling around the rocks and ice. Jack started helping me.
"Why do you think Nefarious chose this place?" I wondered aloud.
"Maybe it helps preserve her," Jack chuckled, then his face turned serious. "A door." We were both brushing the snow away when it opened. We stepped through, and the door echoed shut behind us. We were trapped in the dark, then suddenly, the room came alive with flashes and prisms shining from below. We crept toward the lights. The passageway opened into a large, cold room. A huge sophisticated graphic touch-screen filled the wall in front of us.
"Welcome to Nefarious Enterprises," came a deep, disembodied male voice. "Your business is important to us. Please select and touch the control panel button which corresponds to the personnel with whom you wish to interface."
"I think this is the button," Jack pointed. "It reads, 'Office of Supreme Evil.'"
"That would be it," I said.
Jack pressed the screen. The wall hissed, then groaned as it lifted. Jack smirked. "I think we have an invitation."
Where should Nefarious unleash her furry?